Each night before I go to bed, I say the same prayer:

Dear, God/Buddha/Zeus,

Please let my hair look like Kim Kardashian’s, please don’t let anyone else on eBay bid on that really cute tank with the scalloped collar and please, please let me find the love of my life. Oh, and if you can make world peace happen, that would be great, but only if that doesn’t interfere with me getting that blouse, because I really need something like that in my closet.

Last Saturday evening was no different, except on Sunday when I woke up, I felt like it was the day that I had to take charge and make love finally happen. I bounced out of bed, threw on my robe, and vigorously straightened my hair while applying my daily war paint. I threw on a ridiculously chic outfit (black skinnies, snake-skin flats, a white silk tank and an oversized, straw fedora), and headed out towards Barnes and Noble. You always hear about people meeting their better halves in supermarkets, so I was feelin’ real good about a bookstore. Although, that might have been the morning Xanex/ late-evening Ambien talking.

I parked, and anxiously peeked in my compact before getting out of my car. Whew, I was really nervous and just didn’t know why…

I walked inside and took a deep breath. Please, let me be right about this day, I said to myself, as I wiped my sweaty palms on my pants. I headed towards the magazine stand and it happened. It was just like a scene out of a current Woody Allen movie – our eyes met and I grinned, as I floated to what I had been waiting for…

Which was…

THE VERY FIRST ISSUE OF CR FASHION BOOK, B*TCHES!

I’ve been reading Vogue since I was old enough to understand that pretty/ruthlessly ambitious people rule the world (shout-out to the future me) and while Anna Wintour will always be my main lady, I’ve found that her close rival is Carine Roitfeld, ex-editor of Paris Vogue, has been quickly and sneakily pushing herself into my life – much as I imagined how Eddie Cibrian and his dimples felt after meeting LeAnn Rimes while still married to Housewive’s Brandi Glanville.

Anna to the left, Carine to the right
Photo via Pages Digital

There were several rumors that Carine was supposed to take over Anna’ job, but there was some falling out with Carine and Paris Vogue, resulting in her leaving the iconic magazine and starting her own – hence, the nascency of CR Fashion Book. No one really knows what happened and why it ended it like it did (…or I just got super bored googling it and gave up before I could find out). Whatever. All I know is that my heart is full and I owe it all to one lady. No, sorry Mama, I love you, but this isn’t about you today. Today, your baby girl has found love. You still won’t get those grandbabies anytime soon, but now I finally feel true happiness. I felt like this day wouldnt’ come fast enough, but now that it has arrived, I want to share it with you. Check out the two, yes two, covers below:

Putting Kate Upton on the first issue was risky, but I think it paid off well.

Carine is very much into the idea of new life right now, as her daughter Julia recently gave birth. This cover conveys that brilliantly.

I’m leaving for Vegas tomorrow, which means I have a little over three glorious hours in the air to pour over these pages. That also means four-days of photo opportunities for this blog, because puh-lease, you know I’m bringing the fierceness to L.V. Until next time my doves…

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